Today’s episode is a little bit different as I am flying solo. No interview, just me and my closet. I’ve been wanting to do a solo episode for a while, but I didn’t really know what I would talk about for that long without a script. So, I decided I would take you all on a little journey with me.
If you’ve been listening to this podcast for a while you’ll know that I’m not a huge fan of scales, and I take a weight neutral approach in my practice and in my life. And one of my biggest pet peeves is when I see other health professionals preaching to ditch the scale AND then instead go by some other measurement, like their body fat percentage or clothing size.
The truth is, these numbers are just numbers. They don’t have any influence on the work that I do with my clients, and using changes in weight, clothing size, body fat percentage, or anything of the like as a measure for success or failure takes you away from the things that REALLY matter in your life. And the act of trying to reach your goal weight or size or body fat percentage, just distracts you from simply being who you are.
So today, I’m practicing the art of vulnerability, as I too have these distractions. I don’t diet, and I don’t have goal weights or sizes. But I do however, have a shit ton of clothing in my closet that no longer fits me. On some subconscious level it’s there “just in case” it happens to fit me again. Maybe it will, maybe it won’t. At the end of the day, the fact is, a lot of this clothing doesn’t fit me TODAY. So today, I’m taking you through a step-by-step on how to do your own BodyLove Closet Clean Out. I’m getting rid of everything that doesn’t fit, and everything that doesn’t FEEL good (notice I didn’t say LOOK good).
Step 1: Get rid of everything that just plain doesn't fit.
There a few things in here that I definitely don’t even have to try on so I can simply just toss it in the donation or resell pile. There are a couple of things I could try on. They’d probably fit, but I have a feeling they won’t fit the way they used to. The truth is, feelings of inadequacy and failure DO still come up when I try something on that’s too tight. It’s frustrating to see the physical manifestations of weight gain, even if you feel comfortable in your body on a day-to-day basis. What’s important to remember is that you CAN feel this discomfort. It’s not bad, or wrong. But diet culture tells us that this discomfort is a sign that you need to lose the weight, try harder, have more self discipline, and more willpower. Diet culture tells us that this feeling is helpful because it prompts us to “do something about it”. But, BodyLove is about feeling this discomfort, and then taking loving actions towards our bodies anyways. Loving actions can include movement and exercise and eating nutritious foods. But it can also include sleep, connection with loved ones, sex and intimacy. Loving actions are done JUST BECAUSE. They are not done in an effort to control your body size. Just like loving actions towards a partner are done JUST BECAUSE, not in an effort to get them to do what you want.
Step 2: Get rid of everything that doesn't feel good.
A few months ago I started a new practice for trying on clothes. I would put something on, and before I looked in the mirror, I asked myself, how does this feel? I did of course eventually look in the mirror but the initial reaction helped me weed out what I liked a lot faster, and saved the potential to feel bad if a certain size didn’t look the way it “should”.
When we're just living our life, we're not constantly looking ourselves up and down in a mirror. We are feeling our way through our day. If clothes feel uncomfortable, pinching, too tight or too loose, then the chances of us being hyper-focused on our body our heightened. But when we can find things that speak to our style (see below) and actually feel good on, we can go throughout our day feeling confident, with little to no focus on how our body looks.
Step 3: Get rid of anything that doesn’t speak to your style anymore.
BodyLove is not just about finding clothes that fit. It’s about finding things you feel good and confident in. Not things that fit, that you have to hide in. We've all been there. Found the cute dress or shirt that spoke to the style of the person that we wanted to be. Nope. This is about the filling your closet with your current style. Donate or resell pieces that just "aren't you".
What is your biggest takeaway from the BodyLove Project Closet Clean Out? After you try it - please share your experience in the comments below!